Dealing with the system.

Hello everybody. 


How is everyone else doing today?
Me? I am grand. I keep getting told "no" today. "No" I can't get on welfare. "No" we can't give you funding to go back to school. "No" we actually can't give you the phone plan that we said we would. 


So, I am here to talk about schooling. 

A little bit of background information about my schooling history. I was a very good student for a number of years, I did my work. Then I got into middle school and high school and I didn't study or do my homework but I still made good marks. (Could have been better) but I got by. The last few years of high school things got bad and I dropped out a couple of times. I was having family and personal problems and I couldn't deal with school as well. I got pregnant and was very sick then lost the baby. I was completely wrecked. All this happening while trying to go to school, trying to deal with depression. SO I dropped out. 1 credit to go. I tried going back the next year but I wasn't made to be in the system anymore.

And that leads us to today.

My name is Kimberly Pozzolo. I am 19 years old. I can not go back to high school. I can not be a "mature student" because I am not 21. I can not receive funding to go back to school because I don't have my grade 12. I can not get my grade 12 because I can not go back to high school and in New Brunswick, there are no other programs. I want to do correspondence to get my upgrading and grade 12(Which cost 130.00$ each and I have to do 6) so I can do Wildlife conservation and eventually veterinary. But, how am I suppose to get into a school without any pre reqs? How am I suppose to get those pre reqs? I can't.

The system currently is flawed. I feel as though I am being punished for making a little mistake and not finishing school. 

The best part! Even if I did get my grade 12..That one credit.. The post secondary place won't give me funding anyway for school. Just won't do that. How am I suppose to pay $800-$900 on correspondence when I can't pay my rent? Which leads me to welfare..My husband makes $428.00 a pay check. He gets paid every 2 weeks. Our rent is $650. Our power bill is $120. We weren't eligible for welfare because he didn't make less than $380. We can't buy food. let alone pay the rest of the bills we have.

I feel stupid for not staying in school, I feel like my future is ruined because there is no help for me. I am stuck looking for work that everyone is looking to get employed at. What am I suppose to do?


I wish I was the only one that this was happening to. But it isn't. Isn't the system suppose to help us? Isn't the system there to protect us? As a human being we have the right to an education and the right to basic human needs. Right at this point I am not getting my education because the system says they won't help me, and I am pretty much not getting my basic human needs. I have limited food because I don't have a job and my husband works 4 hours. Some things are out of my control and there is nothing that we as individuals or couples can do about it.


So that is my rant for today..Thanks for reading.


Kimberly.

Dealing with communication.

Hey everyone!
It's Kim here and as you may know from my last blog I am married and today has been a very trying day for me. So I want to discuss how I am getting through it and some things that me and my husband do usually to resolve issues that one of us are having.

So the day started out great and we did our own thing. Then at about 2 o'clock  I went to have a nap and during that nap I had a very horrible nightmare about my puppy(Chikondi) being stabbed. Then after I woke up I was really cranky. I started being snappy with my husband and getting annoyed by most f the things he did. Everything is still making me cranky while I write this blog. I am not quite sure why but I just need some time for myself to try and figure out why I am cranky and overreacting.

When me and my partner fight or have disagreements or one of us are cranky we give the other some space. I feel that for me I need some time to just gather my thoughts and feelings then I can talk to him about what I am feeling. We then talk about how he is feeling about what I am doing. One way that you could try getting away to think about things is just saying "I need some time to figure out what I am feeling" or so,etching along those lines. Then of course you take 10 or 15 minutes, maybe longer, to try and really think about what you are feeling and how you can express those thoughts to your spouse or friend. Communication is one of the biggest things in a relationship. If you can not communicate you can't have a healthy relationship which ultimately leads to the end of the relationship or both parties being unhappy.

I have a very hard time expressing my feelings. Which is very difficult when trying to communicate. I have gotten a lot better with practice but I still struggle. The way that I found helped me most was telling him little things first. Telling him that I actually was upset, or angry. After I worked on that I started telling him a little bit about WHY I was any or upset and that eventually worked its way into telling him everything at once..most of the time. I still struggle with it and he still struggles with it.

The first thing you need to do is realize that you have to start communicating.

Than you have to decide what steps you want to take to be more comfortable talking. Another thing we tried was sitting down at night and talking about things that happened that day, or if you are more comfortable writing, write letters to your spouse or friend.

After you are comfortable with that step maybe start telling him some more personal things about your past, about your feelings. Just little things so that you can build trust with them. (Also while you are trying to communicate better they also have to try to communicate better. It isn't a one sided deal.)

Once you are completely comfortable telling him little things from your past maybe pick a bigger event that happened that you might not want to tell them or you are unsure of he they will react when they hear it.

Eventually things will just start coming out. You have to take it slow and be able to trust the people you are telling these things to. Trust takes time to build.

In the end it is very rewarding to know that there is someone that cares about how you are feeling and   Just cares about you in general.


I hope this helps get some of you moving. If you have any questions feel free to ask.

Kim.

Introduction

Hey everyone!

I want this blog channel to be about Life. Everything from marriage to procrastination to allergies. All from my personal experience. 

Hopefully this blog channel will help you in some way.



So, Who else out there just got married?

Well I did. My name is Kimberly Pin...No it's not. It's Kimberly Pozzolo.
I got married on July 12th 2013 to an amazing man. Jeremiah. We got married in his moms backyard which was amazing. We had a small wedding about 50 people and everything was put together at the last minute type thing. Half way through the movie we realized that no one had the rings, and before that we were in the wrong spot and the sun was blinding us and so on and so on.

Even though we had a bunch of things that could have gone differently I wouldn't change it at all. It was simple and romantic and it was perfect.

I have been married for a month now but as all couples there are things that aren't always the best about marriage, or any relationship.

This blog is going to be about my personal experience and giving some tips that helped with my relationship and the things we have done to over come any obstacles. I am in no way saying that we do everything right. There is many times where we look back on a situation and think that we could have done better or at least differently.

There are some things that I am not proud of but I feel like we get along very well and we are both usually very open with each other which wasn't always the case.
I think the biggest and most important thing in a relationship in communication and trust. You have to trust that when you put your feelings out there that he\she won't just knock you down or not care. Also you have to be willing to communicate. Tell him\her when something is wrong or when the other is doing something you don't feel is very appropriate. At the same time you have to let them be themselves. While you can criticize as much as you want you aren't going to get anywhere that way.
You need to be open and forthcoming with your feelings. Which is very hard. Me and my husband had to go through many months of practicing communication and it was very hard. You may know that something is wrong with the other person but whenever you ask they say "No" which can make you feel untrusted. The biggest thing for us was that we started with little things. If I was feeling sad and angry I started off with saying that I was in fact angry or sad. I didn't go into detail(that came later in the process) but it was a start.

That is all for today. I am hoping that my experience will help you with your experience as well as your experience helping with my experience.




So, tell me about your wedding?  Was it a big wedding? Winter wedding?